7 months... and a half

Turkey! You're 7 and a half months old!

You can;
feed yourself most things
crawl like a champ
kneel by yourself
laugh almost as if on cue at the mere sight of your sister
babble 'Dadadada!'. a LOT.
Sometimes put yourself to sleep.
Can find your pacifier and put it back in most mornings to give me a few extra minutes to pry my eyes open.

This past month you've grown a lot. You learned to sit up in your cradle two days before you officially turned 7 months so we had to scramble to get your crib painted and ready. It made me sad to see that cradle get tucked away so soon but you've got big plans apparently and need to be super mobile to do them!

The first time i put you in your crib my heart jumped a bit. It reminded me that even though you outgrew the use of your cradle, you are still so little. I just sometimes wish YOU would remember you're still little. You're in an awful rush little lady. 

You love your high chair. And i love to see you in it. Especially when you're using your chubby little hands to feed yourself. You love love love to eat whatever anyone else is. We tried avocado again and you loved it so much you yelled in anger when you had eaten it all. 

 

Ever since you were a newborn you have liked to kick and rub your feet together when you're really concentrating on something or super mad. You still do it. It drives both me and your dad crazy. 

Because you've finally gotten the whole crawling thing down you, my darling, are like a Visa card. You're everywhere i want to be. Underfoot constantly. You just need to know where i am at all times or you get so so sad. You never take long to find me in the kitchen and your favorite thing to do is to try to eat my legs while i'm cooking or washing dishes. It's a good thing we have a tiny kitchen or you'd get accidentally trampled! 

 

Did i forget to mention you have two tiny razor like teeth now? They're still growing in but they're certainly there. And you don't let me forget it! Luckily you haven't really bitten me while nursing yet. Mostly because you're so busy looking around these days you can't be bothered to slow down for a full nursing session without you being super duper starving. Those big eyes of yours get the best of you! 

If i open the vertical blinds in the kitchen you crawl back and forth along the length of the slider observing the outdoors like a caged lion. You're pacing just waiting for the day that you get to explore the outdoors and try some of that tasty looking grass. (We both know you're going to try to eat some. Every kid does at least a few times) 

You've also just become so so much fun lately. You're happy and smiley at strangers and at night before you nurse for the last time you get so so giddy that nearly anything will have you in stitches. My favorite moment of the day is when Noella notices you're giggly and makes funny noises and faces at you just to make you laugh. You love love love it. Then you try to pull her hair and she runs away. Which makes you laugh again.


We're so delighted and joyed by you little turkey. We can't wait to see what the next month will bring.

We all love you.

Half

Oh Madeline Louise. You're half a year old. Six whole months.

It's breaking my heart in the best ways.

You're so strong willed and determined to do/have/get what you want.

You still demand to be held as often as you can. I've taken to wearing you on my back now that you've got great head control. You're pretty pleased as long as I'm not standing in one spot for too long. (I have to sway while i wash dishes or you start to whine and pull my hair.)

You've started to ride in a shopping cart like a big girl. I make sure to pack some things around you though because if you get excited about something you have this bad habit of stiffening up and throwing yourself in a random direction and I'm afraid of you hitting your little head. You lasted almost a whole shopping trip through Sams club without me holding you.

Speaking of holding, you're getting better about letting Daddy hold you when i'm around. Though if you're the tiniest bit hungry or tired you start this high pitched whine and dive bomb in my direction if you see me. If i stay out of sight you're fine, so I'll admit I sometimes finding excuses to be in another room so Daddy can get some time with you too. 

You bring that man SO much joy and you always seem to happy when he calls you his 'Turk Turklestein'. (Because your nickname happens to be Turkey and so we like to come up with variations to change it up sometimes)

Quite often I get the 'I'm SO over this Mom' look. You seem unimpressed by a lot of new experiences.You're pretty stoic until you form an definitive opinion. Very much unlike your sister and I who approach everything with a smile. You like to think about things and take your time. 

Most mornings when I go in your room to get you I'm greeted by half your little face popped up over the side of your cradle. It makes me sad because it means you're that much closer to outgrowing it. I LOVE that cradle and as soon as you start to pull yourself up on things we have to ditch it for the big crib. It's vintage and so easy for me to get you into when you're sleeping and I don't have to break my ribs leaning over the side to put you into it. Please stay uninterested in learning to stand a bit longer. 

You've started to sit up on your own more often though you still prefer to lay down. I keep the boppy around you just in case yous stiffen up and i can't catch you in time.

You also LOVE to eat. You have some trouble with textures just like Daddy and big Sis but you never refuse food. You've tried avocado, peaches, apples, blueberries, banana, carrots, broccoli, mashed potatoes, squash, oatmeal, sourdough toast, green beans, strawberries and you've loved them ALL. So much that if you see me eating and you're on the floor, you turn yourself to face me and whimper straight up sad puppy style. It's so sad and so cute. 

You're STILL in 0-3 month clothing except for jammies. You're finally too tall for the 0-3 month jammies. I'm starting to rotate some of the smaller 3-6 month things we have into your wardrobe but most of the things we've tried look silly because they just hang off of you. I'm thankful you're small though. It's stretching out the amount of time you can wear what we have for you that much longer before i have to start shopping again. You've started to FINALLY fill out with some lovely delicious rolls and you've got quite the double chin going too. I love it. I really really do. I struggled with you being on the skinny side for a long time but you're catching up a bit and it's marvelous.

You can scoot pretty efficiently. But... backwards. Like... on your back. With a creepy gonna-break-your-neck back bed. But it gets you where you want to go for the most part. You get stuck on the corners of the couches or under them sometimes. 

I'm glad you haven't officially started to crawl yet. I thought for sure by now you would be but please keep waiting. It's making keeping track of you that much easier. I have a feeling that once you start really moving you'll be impossible to stop. 

You still light up with uncontrollable smiles and giggles and wiggles whenever Noella comes near you. I never tire to see how much you love her. Her favorite thing to do lately it to rescue you from the tile. She grabs your little feet and carefully tugs you back onto the carpet. Then you scoot right back off again in sheer delight of her presence. 

You've taught me to really slow down in the past month. To let us eat easy meals more often and to snuggle more. Your love for me is still all consuming and sometimes still sucks the life out of me but i'm thankful everyday for you. 

I love you my tiny Turkey and i'm excited for the next 6 months. 

Five

Maddie Lou Who!!

You're five months old today! Holy cow! Five whole months! And it really has gone by in a flash. It's like I blinked twice back when you were still safe in my water balloon, saw you as a newborn and now you're this tiny marvelous semi-mobile creature!

Yep. That's right folks. Madeline is semi-mobile. She's working on lunging on all fours and is a champion backwards scooter when she wants the object juuuuust out of reach in front of her. Crazy but true.

This past month has been awesome. Full of adventures and triumphs.

We started the month off with your very first trip. Just you and I flew all the way out west to see my best friend Heather Kunz get married to her lumberjack. You got to meet my other very good friend Amanda too and sat in a high chair for the very first time!

It was so very lovely and green out there. We spent some time in Heather's backyard in Rexburg ID and you seemed to love it. I certainly did. It was a lovely change from good ol' Florida! 

 It was a short trip and you were a champion traveler until I lost your paci on the last leg from the Vegas airport home... whoops! Before that little adventure, you were scooped up and showed off at the Salt Lake airport by a group of retired Chinese travelers. They were SO enamored with you. They all stood around and chattered and took pictures with you. It was quite the surreal experience since none of them spoke English and we don't speak Chinese but you were a trooper and very fascinated with them.

When we returned home you decided for the first few days to take two 2 hour naps a day. It was heavenly and i thought you FINALLY had this whole napping thing figured out. I was wrong because after about 3 days of blissful naps you went back to your unpredictable catnapping ways. 

The last weekend of May was Memorial Day weekend. My dad, your Papa, drove down to Savannah GA for the weekend for a job interview so we decided to make the 4 hour drive up since you hadn't met him yet. Just like your sister at your age, you were cool with him in short bursts but anything longer than 5 minutes and you gave this terrifically sad look and started to cry. Don't worry. You'll warm up to him. He's pretty awesome. I promise. 

We made you a little nest in the hotel room and you slept from 8 until 5;45 without a peep. We were stressing about sleeping all together in one room because you tend to be a light sleeper but you were a champ. We were so proud.

On the way home from our Georgia excursion, we stopped by Peach World. Obviously nothing here interested you all that much but we did get a family photo and it was a fun little part of our trip. 

You're starting to LOVE to sit up more and more often. You're also really getting the hang of holding things. (No pun intended) Your current favorite thing to hold is a plastic spoon. I had to convince your sister that it was okay for you to borrow one because they're 'hers'. 

You also tried your first food this month. It was sweet potatoes. I swore we were going to just skip the purees all together with you and only offer table foods and let you figure things out but after a few weeks of lip smacking and chewing motions and you staring me down whenever i ate, we decided to try it. You were excited for about three spoonfuls and then proceeded to push whatever you had left in your mouth right back out again. So i didn't push it. I gave you the spoon and you played with it a while and i got to eat my dinner while you watched me intently. 

At five months old you can;

Bring objects to your mouth and rarely miss

sit up unassisted for about 10 seconds at a time

get up on all fours

scoot backwards

roll front to back and allllllllmost can go back to front if you could just learn to kick that arm out from underneath you

you still wear 0-3 month and newborn size clothing, though the newborn pants are more like capris now. you're one tiny little turkey!

You babble when you wake up most of the time at night

You can make an 'n' and 'g' sound

you can rotate yourself completely around while on your tummy

you cried it out for the first time and have been sleeping better during the day since that night

you still love your paci while you sleep as much as i want you to be rid of it. 

you still LOVE to nurse and are starting to finally fill out a bit more. 

Sometimes you'll smile at strangers but in general you're still super clingy to me. 

I can't wait to see what this next month brings. 

First haircut

Noella has had haircuts before. I trimmed her bangs up when she was about 18 months old and I've barely trimmed the ends to get rid of some of the split ends and even things up the tiniest bit. But I knew she was REALLY growing up the day she came to me and asked for a haircut in a SALON and NOT at home. 

Being the frugal mama i am, i called a few places around town. Most places charge an arm and a leg for haircuts even for little kids and i was worried that Noella, being only four, wouldn't have the patience to sit in the salon chair for two hours and i certainly didn't want to pay $30 for a first haircut. Sorry babe, but it's true.

Luckily there's a hair school right down the road so if she wanted to bail partway through, i wouldn't be out that much money.  I made an appointment and Noella was unbelievably excited.

She was pretty patient while we figured out what to do with her hair. I had initially wanted to cut it into a chin length bob but Noella was adamant that she wanted to keep her "Rapunzel hair" so we compromised with two inches off and some layers added in. 

Getting through the hairwashing was a bit of a struggle. Noella was unsure of leaning back into the bowl but finally relaxed once the water started to stream through her hair. 

It was hard for me to see her in that chair because my little mama heart knew she's just getting that much bigger. She's too cool for me to cut her hair now. She's too grown up and sophisticated. 

Watching her in that chair was a funny transition for me. She instantly went from my toddler into a pre-schooler. I've known for a long time that she hasn't been a toddler but there was something that just clicked for me when i saw her sitting up there in a 'real salon' chair. She just suddenly LOOKED so grown up and just... BIG. 

Noella was pretty enthralled with the big mirror in front of her. It was pretty funny to watch her watch herself.  She kept pulling finny faces and then laughing at herself. 

In the end, it wasn't a dramatic change but she looks just so darn grown up to me. But perhaps it is a case of mama-goggles. 

She sure has come a long way from her first trim in her high chair so so long ago. 

This babe

This babe will be 3 years old in 8...erm... 7 days. (I say 7 because I'm writing this at 11pm and an hour doesn't count as a whole day. two hours, maybe) Can you believe it? I certainly can't. She rarely lets me photograph her lately with any semblance of eye contact so this was all I could get to commemorate this momentous occasion. (And it cost me 3 marshmallows.)

 She's crazy smart for her age and so SO tall. It's hard to believe she started out as 7lbs 3ozs of baby. I'm excited for this next year. She's learning so much and so eager to learn! She knows her ABC's and all of her shapes and colors. She's working on learning to write. She knows a bunch about the animals at Seaworld because it's her favorite place in the whole wide world. She knows how to negotiate and will wear you down until she thinks she's getting a fair deal. She's got her own ideas about EVERYTHING and oh, what a chatterbox! Every single time the phone rings she thinks it's for her. She calls her Gams at least twice a week to inform her on her daily life. (It gives me about 20-30 minutes to fold laundry or wash dishes so I don't mind too much.) She loves to make her toys talk and will persistently hand you a toy until you give it a voice. Her imagination grows by leaps and bounds each day.

(This one is my favorite) 

She continues to light up our lives with her determination, loving spirit and zest for life and learning. She is a fighter, this one. Mighty, mighty things are in store for her. 

We have some fun adventures coming up for her birthday so stay tuned for more! 

finding the joy

I realize I've been whining about how hard it is to be a mother lately. But. There's also joy to be found. Tons and tons of joy through the tantrums and suffocating attachments. Between the pleas to eat more than a bite for dinner and the 7th potty trip to avoid picking up toys.

There's indescribable joy.

When she asks to "reach me" for a squeeze for no reason what so ever.

When she says "Yuh you Mama. SO much" after a particularly bad tantrum.

When she says orange instead of "Gor-range"

When she willingly eats her chicken.

When she stops what she's doing to dance.

When she tries to avoid eating dinner by singing the ABC song 18 times in a row.

When she has a fit of joy because daddy is home.

There is so so many moments of joy to be found. And getting out the hard parts out of my head has helped me to appreciate them.

She's SO smart. She's SO happy. (Most of the time)

She knows so much and she's only two. She can count backwards from 10, identify colors and shapes. She can make a tower that is 15 blocks tall. She can allllmost jump.  She can identify tons of things just by sound like a door opening or a shower running. She knows the different sounds that a violin, cello, guitar and banjo make.

She amazes me everyday.

You'll never be alone again

Motherhood has taught me that I will never be alone again.

She's everywhere all the time. She reaches her little fingers under the bathroom door. She's pulling a chair over to the sink as I wash the dishes. She's peeking out of the window as I walk to get the mail. She's my shadow. My mini me. My long lost detached appendage.

And some days it's charming. Lately, it's been... suffocating.

Motherhood is hard. I accept that. I knew I was in for sacrifice and less "me" time. I knew for a while I wouldn't be able to pee alone during the day because inquiring minds need to know where I am at all times.

But something has changed in that darling babe of mine in the past few weeks. A bit of her independence has slipped away. She now needs me, my attention, my presence more than ever. I can't figure out what's gotten her so attached but I sure do miss having a tiny bit of freedom in my days.

She needs to "help mommy" with everything. Somethings she can help with like putting away laundry, helping to pick up things that don't belong in the dirt pile after sweeping (like that red block I asked her to pick up 108 times before I started sweeping). She helps out by putting dirty clothes into the hampers and can bring her dirty dishes to the sink. But there are some things that used to be just mine. A few chores that lent me a moment during the day that she's suddenly adamant that she join me in doing. Like the dishes. It used to be 10 minutes I was able to just think and stare out the window as my hands washed dishes in the warm water. A little break in my afternoon. Now it's a battle of the wills as to who will get that ceramic bowl to the sink first. She broke my favorite mug "helping". I kind of needed a moment after that one. 

It's lovely to see her taking an interest in the daily chores but it's also made them that much harder to complete. And Jason will tell you, there have been many days he comes home to things half finished because someone's "help" was a little too much. She has the hardest time listening when she's told to not touch something. She's learned to avoid eye contact when she's being redirected because if she can't see me, she clearly can't hear me.

Should I be complaining about this? Probably not. Are there kids out there that won't ever want to help? You bet. Does it make the control freak in me feel any better? Nope. I would just like a moment to do something without hearing "mommy!? I help you!?" 1,287 times in five minutes. That's all. And I would like to stop feeling guilty for not loving every minute of my toddler wanting to help me. Being as independent as I am, I need to do things by myself during the day.

This point in motherhood has me struggling. The clinging. The constant need for my undivided attention. I make sure I play with her. I build forts and build with blocks. We bake together. I color with her. We go on walks. We chase each other around the house and have dance parties. She gets tons of my attention and it just doesn't seem like it's enough, It feels like I'M not enough. She needs all of me and more. And most days, I am SO grateful Jason walks through that door at 6pm because I am drained.

Motherhood is hard. And whoever thinks it isn't can go stick their head in the sand.