Last First

Three years ago today I was a nanny in Westport, New York just wishing the hours away until I was "off duty" and able to leave for my last first date ever.

This picture was not from our first date but it's one of our very first photos together. 

Jason and I had met officially for the first time 6 days before. He was somewhat shy when I met him but super friendly. I was nervous and therefore didn't come across as the bubbly personable girl I am. We were being set up by the daughter of my employer who worked with Jason. She told me he was 27. She told him I was 24. I was 20 and he was 29. She might not have gotten her facts right but she sure did know we would click.

For our first date I didn't think it was proper for Jason to have to drive all the way to Westport to pick me up (because it's an hour away from... everything. Seriously. It is.) so we agreed to meet in the parking lot of the Mall. I was a bit early because I was so excited. It had been a while since I had been on a date. When Jason showed up we went into Target to run an errand for the woman I worked for really quick. I don't remember exactly what we did but I do remember it had something to do with a Leap Pad something or other and a card. I remember the card especially because the card section of Target was so busy we were pushed together and boy, oh boy! did he smell good!

From there we took his car to my first hockey game. Plattsburgh is a college town so naturally, it was a college hockey game. It was the Plattsburgh Cardinals against the Buffalo State Bengals. Plattsburgh won 4-2. It was super exciting even though I had little clue as to what I was watching.

After the game he took me to Ground Round for dinner. (His favorite restaurant  I remember it was the first time I had ever been seated in the bar section of a restaurant. Our booth had this little T.V. on the side by the window. We ordered our food and made small talk. Jason left his hand resting just past the middle of the table hoping I would hold it. I was too chicken to "make the first move" but I set my hand near by secretly hoping he'd grab mine first.

After our lovely dinner, he drove me back to the mall to get my car. I thanked him and apparently mumbled some sort of good bye before hopping out of his car to get into mine. (I don't remember saying goodbye but according to Jason it totally happened) I stood by my car for a minute looking at Jason. Finally I jerked my head a little to get him to get out of the car. He thought something was wrong. Nope. I just wanted to have a proper goodbye.

He walked over to me and we stood there for a moment before we hugged. We lingered in our hugging for a moment and Jason rested his forehead on mine. And then, here's where the "magic" happened. (and something I will NEVER ever ever live down) I was nervous. I had never been this physically close to a boy (or in this case, a man) before. We were silently standing there in the freezing cold of a North Country winter. I looked up with Jason's forehead still resting on mine and what do you think happened? I went a little crossed eyed and then experienced what I call diarrhea of the mouth. I told him exactly what I saw. "You have one big eye". Magic moment ruined forever. Jason said something about me ruining the moment and he kissed me anyway.

engagement- A Likeness of Something photography

We stood in that parking lot and erm... "talked" for an hour before I realized it was almost midnight and the next day we had plans to meet the girl who set us up and her fiance in Burlington VT for lunch. Funny thing about sleeping though... Not much sleep was had that night. I was lighter than air. That night forever changed the direction of my life.

Four little words.

Noella has an obsession with bananas. (among a rapidly growing list of other things lately including forks, babies and telling me to 'it-chen!'(listen) for sounds all day)

This morning my almost two year old strung together a four word sentence. When deciding about breakfast, (which, to be honest there isn't much deciding needed), she stood on her tippy toes to look over the top of the counter and said 'Yes please 'nana Mom!'.

First, it kills me that her Mommy phase hasn't lasted very long. I'm a little sad that now I'm just Mom. Occasionally Mamamamamama! When she's particularly wild.  Secondly, holy cow. Four words! Who knew I'd be so excited to hear a fragmented sentence!

It blows me away some days to hear what comes out of her mouth. She's picking up on things so quickly and is starting to really have conversations with people. She talked on the phone with my dad yesterday and told him all about going to see the fishes (Seaworld) and how she saw a shark (formerly a whale) and rode on the around around (carousel) and splashed in the water.

I'm really adoring this age through the meltdowns and frustrations. Two is going to be a fine year for us. I just know it.

Nostolgia

I found this picture hanging out somewhere in a dark corner in a forgotten folder of my hard drive. I don't know why I haven't ever shared it because it makes my heart so happy.  It will always remind me of  the year spent in our apartment in Jaffrey NH. It is of our bathroom window. It was taken after a few days of rain when the sun finally came out just before sunset. That apartment will always hold a special place in my heart. Its the place where my babe learned to roll over and took her first steps. The apartment with the 4 sets of stairs to get up into the second floor. It's the first place I felt like was our family home even though it wasn't the apartment we brought Noella home from the hospital to.

I miss that apartment. Well, parts of it. I miss the old charm of the place with it's wooden floors and trim. I miss the glass doorknobs on every door. I miss the ironing board hiding behind that long skinny door next to the bathroom. I miss that there were two parks walking distance from us and that the world's best turkey grinders were only two minutes away if I should have a hankering for one.

That place had character. Though we had noisy neighbors and were constantly tracking sand in, we had so many wonderful memories in that place. It's where the missionaries came by every week to talk sports with Jason. It's where we fell into a perfectly predictable weekly routine. It's where Jason left the house at 7:45 am and walked back through the door at 4:34 pm everyday.

Today, I'm missing our cozy little life in New Hampshire. Even though our life in Florida has brought us so many blessings, I'm missing the familiar.

tiny.

If having a toddler has taught me anything, it's the time is precious and sometimes you need to stop and take a minute. After all, wasn't it just yesterday that dirt covered girl was a precious newborn babe?

She reminds me to look at things and really see them. I feel like as we grow up, we tend to take things for granted such as the trees or seeing a neighbor walking their dog. We look but we don't see.

 Noella is constantly pointing to things and shouting enthusiastically. Moon! Bird! Payne! (Plane. We have lots of those flying over our house) Most of the time we are walking to somewhere so I give her a little "yes, that's a bird honey. Very good" and keep on trucking. But yesterday it hit me how much she loves to see those sorts of things. They are all still relatively new to her. She is still captivated by looking into the sky and seeing the moon hanging up there or a flock of birds as the glide and twist with the wind. How often do I stand outside and stare off into the sky for the sake of seeing what's there? Almost never. Because I'm an adult. And adults, well, we just already know what's up there. We learned when we were young and now we're so over it and moved on. We have mortgages and groceries and electric bills to worry about after all. 



How much are we missing out on because we aren't taking a moment to "take it all in"? A lot I think. We take things for granted because they always have been there and will continue to be pretty much the same until we die. Like the moon. But golly is it gorgeous hanging in  a dusky sky. And the mostly bare trees twisting ever upward to the sky? Breath taking. So this week, I dare you. Take a moment and think like a toddler. Pretend everything is new. Study the patterns the ants make on the sidewalk or just stare at the moon for 10 minutes and imagine you can see every single crater. It will make all your other problems seem insignificant and the world might seem a bit shinier for it.

routine

I'll admit it. I've never been obessive about a clean house. I'm okay with a smattering of cheerios on the floor until the morning or a sink with dishes left from yesterday.

Lately though, something changed. I don't know what sparked it but I'm suddenly finding this little burst of energy after Noella is down for the night to clean up the house. Nothing intense just generally picking up what was left to do from the day and the dishes even get done. It's unusual because I am not the type to worry about those things. They can always be done in the morning. Not any more. This new whatever it is kind of takes over and in about 35 minutes all my normal "chores" are done. Including mopping. I've mopped three times this week. THREE! That's some kind of record I tell ya. 

I used to just wait until just before Jason came home to start cleaning (around 4) and then go right into cooking dinner but then I realized, after dinner, there is always food on the floor, toys are taken back out as well as books so why bother? 

This new routine makes my days much happier. I can just get up in the morning and put away the dishes and be on my way. Gone are the days of Noella fighting with the broom or dishes for my attention. We can just settle in and I don't worry about much cleaning until bedtime. Then Noella puts away all of her toys and books, we get ready for bed and she even puts her clothes into the hamper now before bed. It's making things run a little more smoothly in our house. It also frees up naptime for me to have a little time by my self to do what I'd like to, be it editing photos, reading or working on my cross stitch project (a little more on that later). I wonder why I never thought of this before. 

I can tell you, I'm not at all opposed to a two year old with chores. Teach them while they are young I say! She is so obedient about it too (9 times out of 10. There are always days where she's had enough and doesn't want to do anything).  She knows exactly where everything goes now too. She even piles all of her pots and pans into her little sink. Everything has it's place in her little world and it's just so darling. I hope our next babe is as awesome as she is. 

I also hope against hope that I can keep this momentum going. I'm liking having a clean house. 

Little Lady.

While on the phone to the cable company: 

Noella: "Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!"


Me: "Can you hold on a second sweetie?" *trying to remember the number I needed to push from the electronic promt*


Noella: "Mommy! Mommy!" *slapping my knee and pulling on my pants* 

Me: *sighs and hangs up because the prompt has gotten me no where* "What can I do for you babe?"


Noella: "Mommy! I pahted!"

Oh good. She farted.
Now I understand what was so important she couldn't hold on one more minute. 

270

This morning the Miss took off running down the hall and disappeared into my bedroom. This didn't alarm me because really, there isn't anything she can destroy and she usually comes back out in a minute looking for something else to explore.

But this morning. She came tearing back out of my room yelling "Red! Red mama! Red! Please!?".

That babe had found my red nail polish sitting on the bedside table and came running to me with it clutched tightly in her little fist.

Clearly this unprompted identification of color meant that she, indeed, would have red please mama.